couple-itis
Couples are everywhere. its like... for some reason, its the season or something, because cute couples are fucking everywhere. i'm at the store and i'll see a girl wandering around doin nothing...looking at nothing and i'll ask if she needs anything and she'll be like, "nah, my boyfriend is buying a (insert useless man purchase here). i'm just browsing while i wait."i decided that since i was getting sick of seeing all of these amiable couples skipping around like they had shit to worry about (god... i'm petty arent i) i'd fuck with them a little bit. gave me something to do... i'd see the girl and roll up and be like, "let me guess, your boyfriend is buying a..." "stereo. god is it obvious?" "no, just getting used to noticing. did you want anything?" "no i'm fine. i'm just looking around." "so which guy is your boyfriend?" "the blond guy in the hat." "ok, well if you need anything, let me know." "sure." so now i roll up on the bf. "hey man. finding everything ok?" "yeah, they're just installing my deck." "cool cool. is that your ladyfriend over there?" "her? yeah. why?" "oh nothing. just saw you guys come in. so are you going somewhere for her after this?" "what do you mean?" "well you know how it works... best buy for you, nordstroms for her, cartoys for you, old navy for her..." "nah nah. just me man. shes not one of those 'shoppin' girls, y'know?" "oh, yeah. cool." now, back to the girl. "you sure youre ok?" "yeah, i'm good. his deck should be done soon." "probably. so you dont drag him anywhere like this do you?" "nah, he hates it." "well, id think he'd owe it to you, but thats just my thing. s'not like you can't STOP by and LOOK at some shoes for a sec, right?" "well..." "none of my business. sorry. you let me know if you need a checker or something. take care."then... i get to watch the conversation about how they're going to the gap after this... he argues, she looks at him... he hangs his head and they leave. i'm going to hell....
posted by AmeroKafka @ 7:02 PM
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